Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Gratefulgiving?

Mom,
The word thanksgiving just doesn't seem to fit this year.

I mean really though...

I can't say that I'm thankful that Dad, Shelby, and I will be separated this holiday.

nor can I say that I'm thankful for your illness or your passing

I can say though, that I'm grateful that ...even though Dad will be visiting his parents while Shelby and I stay in town...we as a family still know what is best for each other and aren't letting our circumstances this holiday get in the way of the amount of love we have for each other. We are encouraging each other to make the best personal decision we can.

I can say I'm grateful for what your passing mom has taught me: Just how powerful love can be, how many blessings I have, and just how much of a fighter and a beautiful mom you were.

 Sure, I would have gladly loved to learn these lessons another way...but I'm still being given the opportunity to grow because of them...and for that I am grateful.

Others may say the words grateful and thankful are the same word...I strongly disagree.

In my mind if you're thankful for an event, or a person than you are acknowledging and accepting that what came out of that event or person was positive and beneficial. In other words the outcome aided you in some way.

On the other hand, if you say you're grateful for something then, in my mind, I believe you are acknowledging that what came out of a person or event doesn't have to be positive or beneficial but can be something that although painful or damaging, taught you something. If you are grateful for something I believe that you see the outcome as necessary to what makes you who you are.

The events that have occurred this pass year in my life were necessary in making me who I am today. They make me grateful because without them I wouldn't have realized what a blessing it is right this very moment to be wearing my favorite t-shirt of yours. Without these events I wouldn't have had the opportunity to grow in character...I wouldn't have had the opportunity to be strong, courageous, loving, and bold.

The people that have come and gone in my life this past year have built me into the sort of women I hope to become. They have and are giving me my foundation for which I will grow.

Mom, you gave me my strength...you taught me to fight to the end no matter what. You taught me to love beyond my own bounds.... to remind those who you care, admire, and love just how much you appreciate them, not every so often, but ALL the time.

With all this now spewed on the blank face of my blogger screen I will end with saying that,while I may be saying Happy Thanksgiving to my friends and family tomorrow.... in my mind I will be saying "Happy Gratefulgiving Day my friends! "

Be grateful, not only thankful, because everything that has occurred to you is for purpose. Maybe not to make you better according to societies standards but to make you a better version of yourself.

Love always and Forever
Your Daughter,
Brittany

Sunday, November 14, 2010

I'm not Superwoman... but I will try to be for you

We all are struggling with something. This post is written to my friends who have experienced heartache this week, those three who lost loved ones, and the others, including myself, who fought hard for something and just barely missed the mark. Be proud of your momentary pain my friends...because it is just that: momentary. Be proud of your strength and carry on knowing that you my friends inspire. I love you all. Britt

"It is difficult to live in the present, ridiculous to live in the future and impossible to live in the past. Nothing is as far away as one minute ago." Jim Bishop

Ordinary riches can be stolen, real riches cannot. In your soul are infinitely precious things that cannot be taken from you.” Oscar Wilde
"Sometimes I need only to stand, wherever I am, to be blessed."-Mary Oliver
“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…it has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival - C.S. Lewis

"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" -Mary Oliver

"Before someone’s tomorrow has been taken away, cherish those you love,appreciate them today." -Michelle Ustaszeski
"Keep some room in your heart for the unimaginable"-Mary Oliver

"What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose for all that we love deeply become apart of us" Helen Keller

I can't stand watching others in pain. I can take pain myself, sure I dislike it too but I'd much rather take the pain myself than watch someone else have to endure it.

Let us stand together. Let us fight the pain together. Let me take some of your burdens. Let me love and support you. After all, that is all I can really give you. I can't take back time or reverse what has been done but I can take the struggles with you. I want to, let me help.

Thank you my friends for fighting for the desires of your heart. Thank you my friends for loving those people you lost this week...whether a grandfather...a boyfriend...or a friend. Thank you my friends for giving me strength by allowing me to watch you grow into the beautiful people that you are.

Thank you for fighting your pain and for helping me to fight my momentary pain also. Let us do this together. Take my hand and I'll take yours. Pain is big and small...but it is concured through the power of many.
Fight your pain together. No matter how big or small. Fight.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

simple thoughts on paper.

I don't say "I love you"  just because it sounds pretty... I say it because I gave you a piece of my heart, a piece of my life, and a permanent spot in my soul. Every utterance of my love shall be a remembrance of the greatness you bring me- greatness that never leaves me.
Whether a friendship or a relationship. Love is all the same. It comes from deep within the soul. It is the spark that ignites every fire in our hearts.
Love...its not a question of whether we deserve it, but rather the question of if we are willing to go after it.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Left Side, Strong Side.

I love sister time. Adore it even.

Today Shelby shared her mad rapping skills with me... we belted songs out of pitch to each other...we had a totally unhealthy dinner...and we just spent time with each other. Laughing & enjoying the presence of one another.

We had an amazing friend over at the same time... but it didn't even matter that it wasn't just us. What mattered was we invested in each other. Shelby into I and I into Shelby. We didn't need to be alone, being with friends was so good for the both of us anyways.

 We didn't need to have a sob fest  or some super deep conversation....we just needed to be in the same room together. We just needed to get a little crazy, let loose, and be ourselves again.

How Refreshing it is... to feel connected again. I am so inspired by my sister.

 We have a bond that can never be broken. We know how to read each other...we know each others needs...and we try our best to be there for each other. Shelby has such a genuine spirit. She truly cares about those in her life. She writes what she calls "gratitude letters" to her friends which absolutely inspired this post. I am so grateful that I have a big sister... She's my big and I'm her little :)

She has such a drive in obtaining her goals in life. She is encouraging and always has a positive attitude. She gives her all in school and in the pool. She is such a leader and inspires others on a daily basis :)
I love everything that makes up my lovely sister.

I love how she laughs when she has too much soda. I love how she is so sweet and kind yet somehow has this hidden "gangster-rapper" that comes out on occasion... if you're lucky. I love how she always supports me when I need it most. I love how she knows the inner workings of me. She recognizes the moments when all I really need is for her to blast the radio and for us to sing together as loud as we can. She recognizes when I'm hurt, and always brightens my mood.She knows just when I need a cup of coffee or a funny joke.  She knows my buttons, and while sometimes that can be rather bothersome... I would never have it any other way. She surprises me everyday with the amount of love she has for life and her friends and family.

Thank you Sister. You have taught me the importance of going after your dreams... the importance of giving someone all the love in your heart. Thank you sister, for always being my best friend, my study partner, my big sister, my mind reader, my care taker, and of course my partner in crime.

"Sister, I am seeking your companionship....Forever and Always I will."

Know that you are loved.You are my biggest inspiration. My most sacred relationship.

I hope only to one day repay you all the love, encouragement, and fun times we have had together.

With so much love and gratitude...

Your little sis forever and always,
                                             Britt.